Friday, September 5, 2008

The good with the bad

I am getting to like this writing venue. It feels less focused on the illness and fallout from that. I find myself wanting to write about what is going on in life, as well as what is going on with the "after nf" stuff. I think it's good to start off with what ever is stronger for me that particular day; aftereffects of nf, or current events. The CB website felt a little boxed-in to write mostly about illness & those difficulties. Isn't it interesting how changing where one writes changes the feeling of the writing?

Today both areas of life are strong, for the negative & positive. I'll start with the after nf stuff, because it is very current for today.

I found myself today with a good deal of pain. What happened was I was on my feet *a lot* last night (more on that later in the positive stuff) with the pressure garment on me. I got home late and washed it, and this morning, because I washed it late, it wasn't ready to wear. So, I went without it this morning. Now (Friday afternoon) I have a lot of pain, and crazy itching of the skin graft and the donor leg site. The groin pain is very similar to the hernia pain I used to get when I had the hernia during pregnancies, (but more intense now, with the lymph swelling pain). It was very painful at those times, and I had a hernia pregnancy belt to wear for the 7 months or so that it hurt, until after the birth. Now, after I went to fix that hernia, I am left with similar pain on a regular basis in which I need the pressure garment all the time, instead of just during pregnancies. Which, btw, won't be happening (short of a miracle). Today I feel like writing to the surgeon I feel is responsible for this and tell him that. But I never do that when I feel like it, of course. Maybe someday. I am sick of pain, and sick of the necessity to wear the pressure garment all the time, in this crazy heat. I just called the OT department at the hospital and put in an order for a 2nd one; I can't be stranded without one if I'm washing it. More hundreds of shekels.
I wonder what is up with our lawsuit beginning.... Gotta call the lawyer and get an update.

~~~now something a bit more positive~~~

So, I said I was on my feet for 3 hours yesterday.... why, you ask? I went to hear Shlomo Artzi in a town nearby Be'er Sheva! It was so much fun. I went with Sabrina; Robert had to work. Artzi is an Israeli historical icon. It was incredible, I really enjoyed myself. I was dancing all night standing there! It was outside on the grass of a soccer stadium, and we got there early to stake out a good spot near the front. We sat on a blanket, but shortly before the performance we had to stand, because everyone else was. We were practically shoulder-to-shoulder, but it was OK. It was too loud for me at times, but I had earplugs. :-) I felt young and free of worries. It transported me to another time. Some of the songs he sang were 15 or 20 years old, and I really loved hearing them. He is a bit like the Bruce Springsteen of Israel stylistically, but his song content is much better. :-) We had a blast.

The bad with the good, that's what this life is all about, right? I am thankful that I can recognize both, that is truly a gift.
Shabbat Shalom!

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