Friday, May 10, 2013

two hips and a hand

It is just getting too hard for me to type, or just about do anything involving my right hand. It is **soooo** frustrating, you cannot imagine. It seems that Hashem has big plans for me. So big that I have to learn what life is like being challenged with my legs, and now my dominant hand. What is it about my limbs that I am not 'getting' here?

At least, Baruch Hashem, this new cast does not cause me any rash.

We took some pictures for posterity of the splint, custom made by this special woman, an occupational therapist at Soroka. I will go see her again on Monday to check on it and start gentle therapy. Again, I feel so fortunate to have jumped the waiting list.

These are the pictures of it... and after this post, I will put it back on, and go to sleep.



 



I am under strict orders not to take it off; only for showering. I *must* completely rest this hand or else it will never heal (it's already been what... three months since the first fall?). What it most needs is rest. REALLY hard... it is a real art to do anything without using your thumb.(driving, laundry- new machine!, cooking, to name a few of the biggies. How... just HOW?)

I told Robert that I feel I am in the world of the useless, while he is working so incredibly hard, all day, round the clock. It is the end of the school year... lots of bagrut exams (high school exit exams) from his English students to grade, and still working on taxes, and other stuff. I'll write about the other stuff in another update, when that stuff is finalized. That last one is *good* stuff, but hard to organize, and he has been doing it all.

But I do feel we are in two totally different worlds.
And I do feel frustrated with my wrist problem, and yeah, useless.

OK, going to sleep. Gotta get that thing back on my hand, I feel soreness creeping in....

3 comments :

  1. sending you many tefillot for a complete refua along with alot of hugs! rochel.

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  2. Dear, dear Sarah,

    You have done soooo much work. I know that sometimes it feels like “what’s left? What haven’t I worked through? “But this is our job. It’s our work to be in a constant state of “perfecting”.

    If Hashem is everything, how can he be both perfect and in a state of perfecting at the same time? Hence, comes Man. We “give Hashem wholeness” though our work of “perfecting.” Ever peeling the onion and ever giving Hashem nachas as we go deeper and deeper on the inner journey.

    Baruch Hashem you know that your body has been sending you deep messages. The work now is to decipher.

    I love you and I’m here.
    Have a sweet Shabbos,

    Miriam

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    Replies
    1. Hi Dear Miriam,
      Shavuah tov!
      You hit the nail right on the head. Everything you said. My blog post seemed more about news about my hand problems, but that gnawing feeling that I have recently had about "what are my limbs trying to tell me", or "what is Hashem trying to tell me through injured, painful limbs"? *That* is the core of what is going on deeply with me.

      I was just so relieved to read your letter, and instantly transformed to the space in the middle of my body, the neshama (soul) perhaps, that is hungry to do that work, and with someone who hears the underlying messages with clarity.
      Thank Gd for you, dear Miriam!!

      love & hugs, and gratitude,
      Sarah

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