Friday, October 10, 2014

system overload.... crash of Prototype 2

Too, too, too much for me.
Spent the last 26 hours in bed. Not asleep all the time, but in bed with pain and headaches. Yesterday I took migraine meds twice in one day... not good.

Holidays are so hard. Too much was put off until the day of the chag (holy-day), and it was awful. I tried to get things done early, but it didn't work. The "state of the union" over here in my house wasn't functioning at maximum capacity, let's say.

I shouted at the kids and Robert. I was so frustrated, it was unbearable.

I was on my feet basically for two days straight, with an 8 hour sleep in the middle (not enough for me because of the meds). Shopping for chag clothes with Shifra wound up to be a many-hours excursion with little success. She wants it all too short and too tight. I offered so many great outfits (at least, I thought were great, and I think I have good taste in outfitting), all rejected in the changing room. *You* try shopping with a red-headed 'tween who enjoys her maturing curves. In the end of the day (the day before the day of chag) I shed some tears in the car on the way home- out of exhaustion as much as frustration- and she helped cheer me up! She is an awesome child, I know that. She said she'd find what to wear from her closet, and she appreciated my taking her, and to always look on the bright side. *Shifra* said this to *me*. She's a great kid. Difficult, but great.

Ya'akov's amazing high school is in danger of closing down in two weeks unless they come up with about $200,000 (US), or 700,000 shekels. It's a complicated explanation, and I don't want to get into the politics of it, but I am so stressed out. What are we gonna do? The first time he is in a perfect place for him, and he is *Happy* in school. Now it may all dissolve before our eyes. Will he not have a school? Really? Will we be scrambling to get him in someplace in the middle of October???? Pressure is unbearable. Gotta pray on this one in a big way.

Gotta go- almost Shabbat. Robert took over the kitchen today, thankfully. I hope I can make it through and be a good hostess.
Shabbat Shalom from my bed........

[I am not proof-reading, so sorry. Just wanted to get this out.]


  1. hope you had a restful shabbat. maybe for the next couple of days, just hang low, enjoy the family, rest more, try not to run around so much. eat good and just spend quality time with the family. If the kids wanna go out , maybe your husband can take them. I know he works hard, but try to get your strenghth back. chag samaech.

  2. Sympathize. Wish I could help.

  3. I hope Ya'akov's school gets the funding it needs. Think positive. BE"H they will.

  4. As I read this I wonder if you could set some limits. Tell Shifra you will spend 2 hours max shopping. Does she really need new clothes or want them? Can you set a max amount of time that you will spend preparing? You make me feel exhausted by all that you do and then have to recover from. I wonder if you set your sights too high. It may not be done as much as you want but that is normal, especially as our kids get older and have more things to do. I have to set limits on what my kids do because *I* can't handle the pressure to get them there, back, etc. in addition to not being able to afford some of the activities they would love to do.

    Sometimes it is really hard to set limits on us all because we want so much more than we can have.

    Good luck on the school funding. I can't imagine how hard it is to not know where he will go to school when all the school entrance stuff has been done for quite some time.