Monday, March 23, 2015

18mmg! That number taken in a Hebrew numerical sense means חי: LIFE. 18. yah.

**18mmg** ...and holding steady!
Finally, under 20! (Down from 100mmg!!!!)

That is the dose I am at now, which I went to three days ago. 18mmg.
I have a new goal, borne from impatience. I want to aim for total zero... no Fentanyl at all... by Pesach (Passover, in two weeks). From 18 I have three more doses to take off. I won't wait two weeks between them all, I am so out of patience for this. A headache every day is just over what I can handle on a regular basis. I want to do three doses in two weeks, but I'll see how it goes. When it feels right to take off another dose, I will. I'm not going to enforce the two-week plan any more.

I am going to see my GP tomorrow morning. I have some important things to ask her, and I haven't spoken with any doctor regarding the weaning since I started it 5 or so months ago. It's time for another blood-draw, too. I want to talk to her about the constant daily headaches, and make sure she agrees with me that it's from the weaning. How could it not be? Other side effects to discuss, as well.

As for the pain I am experiencing regularly, I am handling it as it comes. Fentanyl is no longer the answer, I just have to handle it. And reach out for help, like from this naturopath I am going to this Wed... I hope he can help with dietary suggestions which could take down inflammation (90% of the mechanism which causes chronic pain is from inflammation), help me with more energy, get my iron up to par (I've been struggling with slight anemia for a long time now, my diet stinks, and iron pills are awful for someone on narcotics- wreaks havok on the digestive system. That was o-u-t.), and I just want to feel like I look forward to the day. Depression holds a dark cloud over that feeling of looking forward to getting out of bed. I just want to be OFF the Fentanyl already. I've had no real monitoring since I've started this, but I haven't really needed any. It's good that I will catch my doctor up on what has been going on.

With the holiday which celebrates freedom from slavery, I pray that my personal freedom will be granted me by being off the fentanyl. That is one slavery to which I can happily throw off the yoke.

On this Pesach season, tell me what your personal freedoms may be. I'd love to hear them.


  1. An excerpt from

    ... Then I gradually put together an all-natural pain-reducing plan that worked.

    Here’s some potentially helpful information for anyone healing from a bone fracture as I did, or for anyone interested in protecting their bone health (the ideas below can minimize pain from various causes, by the way):

    • Using my Personal Pain-o-Meter (explained a few paragraphs below)
    • Listening to soothing music
    • Sitting in cheer-me-up sunshine (which provides Vitamin D for strong teeth and bones) with and without friends
    • Basing part of my grocery list on advice from Dr. Neal Barnard’s Foods That Fight Pain book. I bought it after interviewing Dr. Barnard about some of his innovative health-promoting techniques several years ago (I’m still a health writer/journalist for hire, folks).

    Shop as I do and you just might feel better after buying from the organic green-grocer and health food store:

    Almonds with Raisins (really!)
    Beans (soak them for a day, changing water 2-3 times so you won’t develop belly bloat)
    Capsaicin Cream (a natural remedy made of chili pepper extracts!)
    Fresh and powdered Ginger Root
    Fresh Figs and/or Fig Jelly
    Sweet Potatoes
    Vitamin B6 (50-150 mg)
    Vitamin E 400 IU

    I ate the foods in abundance and took the vitamins once daily.

    These old standbys also helped me:

    • Arnica Montana (a natural remedy that resembles tiny white pills. Arnica also comes in liquid form)
    • Cuprum Metallicum (a natural remedy that also resembles tiny white pills)
    • Rescue Remedy Cream
    • Rescue Bach Remedy Drops
    • Any bar of soap at all. I have no idea why this folk remedy works, but after I place a bar of soap under a sweatshirt sleeve, under sheets, or upon some other area of sore muscles, the pain reduces noticeably.

    1. Yocheved,
      Thanks for your in-depth recommendations. You have gained good sense through all your travails, thats for sure.

      About the food, I am going to go with what Ya'akov Berman tells me. That is what I decided. I can't commit to organic everything and making smoothies and taking a zillion suppliments. That won't be a working system for me. I hope Ya'akov Berman and I can work out something that can be helpful as well as doable for me. I know my limitations. It's about energy, needing to be in the kitchen a lot just with feeding kids, cleaning up all the time, and no energy left to take care of a special diet for myself. I need it to be simple. I pray that I will get what I need.

      The idea of the pain-o-meter is clever. Worth a try. I don't believe it will work, if I gotta be honest, but I'm game to try.

      I know you have been through so much pain and suffering in your medical life, I deeply respect where your advice is coming from. Thank you for taking the time!

  2. Dear Sarah,

    This isn’t in answer to your question, but – liquid iron supplements contain a stool softener, which eliminates that problem.

    Glad to hear you’re going to see your GP. Hopefully you’ll get some answers.

    All the best,