Cessation of PT, and Kermit is sick

Today was a hard day.
I mean, it started the way many of my days start--
really really hard to get out of bed, but I made myself do it.
I knew that going to the studio to work out would give me what I needed. And it did. :-)

But then I had all sorts of problems with Kermit (my car), and spent some time stuck in a parking spot waiting for my garage guy to come rescue me. That is after yesterday, stranded with the car not starting, and having it towed to the garage, only to have it start happily as soon as it was off the flatbed. Moshe, my garage guy, said he can't try to fix it if he doesn't hear the sound. So I drove away, but only *after* an hour of praying for it to misbehave, just to see it start right up, each and every time.

Anyway, Kermit is spending the night there, with a now identified problem to fix.

But that isn't what made the day the hardest, actually.

I had PT today, too. I try not to double up physical work-outs in one day, but sometimes it's unavoidable. Anyway, I feel strong, I can do it. Baruch Hashem.

But there was a Meeting. The meeting was with my physical therapist, the head of the PT institute (who was my PT guy at the beginning of being home after NF!), and me.

They wanted to tell me that there isn't enough progress to continue the PT. They wanted to know how I feel-- to be honest about if I feel progress or not. If my pain was lessening, or if it was not changing with the PT. I was honest- I said that I feel much stronger, and that is really good for me. I do have pain and it doesn't change a whole lot. It is every day for a few months now, all the time. I can do all the exercises, but with pain. Revital, my physical therapist said that she has worked intensively on my hip and thigh muscles, twice a week, for two months now, with many variations on the theme-- different types of exercising the same muscles. She reported that I always have pain, and have to stop at the same point, or before, each time. I hadn't noticed that. I thought I was making progress because my stamina was better.

They decided to extend my hydrotherapy-- a *very* good thing.
But, no approval for physical therapy until further clarification of my condition from Prof. Meller. Apparently, exercise brings blood to the exercised muscles. But if a tumor is involved, this extra blood flow can actually cause it to grow more. They are concerned that the PT may cause damage. I totally understand and am grateful for their concern and care for me.

I just feel set back. I feel that if they don't want me to continue the PT, then one of the "hope channels" for me seems to have closed today.

And that's why it was a hard day.
But hanging out at the car mechanic on a cold day didn't help either.

Oh... and I have a headache. And a zit.
Now all y'all are going to write comments about how you are sorry to hear about my zit, aren't you.