Rest

This is the point that I rest, and put my faith where it needs to be. I have been working very hard to get ready for this surgery. Working on getting medical tests done, paperwork completed, house and children organized. Running around a lot, trying to think of as many details as my mind will allow.

I need to rest.

My signal for that today was when I called Dr. Raht's office. I spoke to the same secretary who I spoke with a few days ago when I tried to arrange a time to meet with him. She told me to call Wed. morning and she'll ask him. I called this morning, at 8:30, even though my bones all ached and my head was spinning telling me to stay in bed longer. I got up and called, hoping to take the MRI to him and have him take a look. So, Dr. Raht happened to be standing by his secretary when I called. I told her what I am calling about, and she told him. I heard his voice say "tell her that it is not necessary for me to see the MRI. She doesn't need to worry. I don't have time to see her today".

OK. I thought about possibilities like just going to Soroka today and putting the disk on his desk, and not taking any of his time. Then we (Robert & I) thought about the importance of Dr. Yaniv, actually, seeing the disk ASAP. He is the one who is the main surgeon, Raht is the assistant. But going to Tel Aviv yesterday or today is not in our cards. There are limits to the running around and expending large amounts of energy (and money) to make sure the doctors are going to take care of me well. Also, I don't want to be the thorn-in-the-side patient who they won't take seriously. So, I didn't do anything with the MRI disk after the phone call. Dr. Yaniv will see it on Sunday, and that is that. I am prepared for the surgery to be canceled again, because I have come to expect the unexpected. But putting it off again... how would that be a good thing?
It's out of my hands. That's the point here.

And I am going to rest now, I'm so wiped out. I need to refuel, and relax my mind and body before this surgery.