Thursday, February 11, 2010

Not exactly writer's block-- in fact, not at all like writer's block

With Robert mourning the loss of his parents, I feel at a loss with my writing. It's hard to explain why, while maintaining discretion. I have many things I want to write about, and have started four different entries today, and then deleted them all.

I feel my writing is being choked.
I am falling. My need and respect for discretion stops me from getting into detail. I'm sorry about that. I did write a detailed letter to Lily, though, and hope to see her tomorrow.

My writing has what feels like a gag on it, and I cannot rest peacefully. (I just took my 2nd sleeping pill of the night).

Please help me release the gag- I am choking. I can't write. This while Robert mourns the loss of his parents.

3 comments :

  1. Maybe try poetry? It can be easier to express the emotions without trying to justify them with examples. I'm guess the discretion is in the details, not in your current feelings.

    Just letting you know that I'm reading and caring for you, especially after your recent travels (and travails).

    Beth (from oct98)

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  2. I know you said that over the week w/o internet that you had trouble w/ the idea of not writing "live" but maybe you should write everything you want to write, and just don't post it... Or if you need an audience, think of one person with whom you would be comfortable sharing it with, and just send it to that person. Or maybe get yourself a nice notebook, and do it by hand :)
    Good luck... writing is really therapeutic -- you need that!!

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  3. Hey, Sarah,

    Sorry Hillel's fall and split tooth prevented us from meeting for coffee yesterday. We have to find time soon! :)

    You have perceptive friends! Both Beth and Dena have great suggestions re: continuing to write but not necessarily in a public forum. I think all artists suffer through this. Who am I writing/painting/playing for? Do I need an audience, or can I be satisfied that I'm writing (etc.,) for myself? Go for the poetry!!

    Miriam

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