No labels, just healing

A friend who I love and trust sent me a link to a book she thought may be good for me. It is a book about people suffering from something called CFIDS (Chronic fatigue and immune dysfunction syndrome). When my friend read it she said she thought of me.
So I went to the link, and watched the author talk about it. Then I went to other youtube links that were related. I saw people who were spending years in bed from this disease, and also another one called Myalgic Encephalomyelitis. They are both related to Chronic Fatigue, and in the family is also Fibromyalgia.

I don't have any of these diseases.
I see these as the bottom of a slippery slope.

I get out of bed all the time... well, almost all of the time.
My pain is less and less, thank the Lord! It could be from the new medicine helping with the nerve pain. (the itching with Gapey gets better and worse, I have no idea what makes it tick).
I take care of my kids, I cook, clean, and do the laundry.
I laugh with my kids, pick up the little one whenever I want, and go to hydrotherapy once a week and to work out twice a week. I run and stomp in the park playing with my dog if she has had a sedentary day (even if I haven't).

My pain is always in the same place-- left hip/thigh. It's from the NF, the PVNS, bursitis, lymph edema, and a big, finicky skin graft.
My body has been through heck & back. ...accent on And Back.

My brain, well, a bit fuzzy from this all, and suffering from the PTSD from having been in a coma. A few days ago I noticed that the dosage recommendation of the new medicine I started a few weeks ago is more than what I am presently taking; 30mg more a day. That could make a difference with the depression stuff that has been going on recently. I'll talk to my doctor about that.

So, about today: perhaps the fresh fear of these diseases pushed me, but it worked. :-)

It went like this: Got up at a decent time (in comparison to how these past few weeks have gone), showered, gave kids brunch, and I made a picnic to take with us on an outing. (it is Passover vacation over here).
I got out the door very clear and organized.
I was in a remarkably good mood.
I walked around the lake, held Azriel on my shoulders, then sat on the ground for about an hour! (I haven't been able to sit on the ground in two years, my hip just couldn't do those positions.)
Had the picnic together, then went to rent bikes.
I rented a bike also (I have spent time on a stationary bike in PT, so I knew I'd be OK), and had a ride with Dov & Ya'akov through rocky paths and hills (*very* different than the stationary bike!). Shifra & Azriel stayed back with Robert-- Azriel got too scared to ride in the seat on the back of my bike, and Shifra wanted to stay back to learn to ride without training wheels.
So I went. I felt free, like I am not scared of my leg. I lead the boys on the trail... until Dov got a flat tire. Such a bummer. So Ya'akov & I rode back, and I got the van to go to Dov. I loaded Dov's bike into the van and returned to the rental place at the park.
I was getting a headache then, so I took medicine and prayed that it wouldn't turn into a migraine. (it hasn't).
Then we came back to Be'er Sheva and ate dinner at a restaurant.
Now we are home with all the kids sleeping, after a wonderful day of fresh country air, and lots of love.
Tomorrow we have guests coming to stay for Shabbat, through Monday night (Sunday-Monday is the chag at the end of Pesach). Lots of cooking and cleaning up to do.

I don't know what it is, but that email yesterday about these awful, painful, lonely diseases lit a fire under my you-know-what. We had already planned for today to do this trip, but the way I contributed, and the challenges I took on; none of that was planned.

I don't know what tomorrow will bring-- one day at a time here, let's not forget-- but I am doing my absolute best to not step onto that slippery slope of those faceless, debilitating diseases.

I am doing great. (said only with a humble hat tip to Gd)

I also hope that my ladies don't go into labor tonight. Or until at least Wednesday. No, I have a date with Robert to go out Wednesday evening... Thursday or afterward would be fine. :-)

BTW- it's been a long time since I've heard from you guys out there. I miss seeing comments!