So help me God

So please, help me God.

I will get better.
I will be strong again.
I will have more patience with my children.

I will try not to cry out from frustration and exhaustion when I need to rest.
I will be brave.

I will show my family that love, and God, are the only way.

I will take care of myself better.

I will Try.
And if I fail, I will love myself, and keep trying.

Why don't I believe this?

Thank you God,
love, Sarah, trying to allow herself to rest, a day and a half after 12 hours in the ER for a migraine.

(Back to some real time writing:)

I just learned that when I got to the ER on Tuesday evening, my blood pressure was 150/120. That is the highest it has ever been. From pain. I was afraid of a stroke, or an aneurism, God forbid, but I rejected a CT because it would have taken half of the following day, after spending all night there, and I needed to be home. Also, it is so much radiation, it is not to be taken lightly, and I have had many of them in my life. I will do it if the neurologist recommends to do it when I see her next week.